A change of lights and memories (Poem #58)

The lights change,

fading from blues to reds,

and dance across the ceiling,

with each change of color my mind drifts in and out of a dream,

It drifts from memories of my dog,

a hug from my father,

to all the memories I made with you.

All these memories make me smile,

and bring a calming sense of peace,

because these memories and lights give me a break from the pains of my life,

and bring feeling of joy back to my life.

If only you could see…(Poem #50)

If I had a rose petal for every time you made me smile,

I could bath in perfume,

And if I could glow any brighter,

I would become a star.

If I could only you could see that….

I thought of you today…(poem #35)

Here are the instances I thought of you today:

I thought of you when I walked back to my room to go to bed,

and how you saying goodnight reminded me that I am the last person you talked to today.

I thought of you whenever i look down at my phone,

and I see those big brown eyes look up at me,

and those eyes entrance me.

I thought of you as I stood in line at starbucks with my pink bag in hand,

and how you would make fun of me for being a “basic white girl”.

I thought of you as I took a nap,

and grabbed the stuffed animal you bought me,

and how happy it made me that you bought something for me because you thought I would like it,

and becuase you knew it would have a meaning to me.

I thought of you as I saw you walk away to go volunteer,

and how honorable that is,

and how amazing it is that you give your time to others

even when you have so little time for yourself.

I thought of you today when I got out of the shower,

and saw my makeup running down my face,

and how you would still call me beautiful.

I thought of you when I took a sip of my peppermint mocha,

and how much you loved the peppermint hot chocolate I made you,

and how you give me the same warm feeling that drinking it did.

I thought of you with every love song my spotify station is playing as I write this,

because I know now that I am hopelessly falling in love with you,

and every part of you.

I thought of you as I wrote an assignment for class about traveling,

and how I want to go see the world,

but it would be so lonely if you weren’t there.

I thought of you today…

and I never stopped.

Beautifully Insane(Poem #32)

I know my past wasn’t that hard,

and the the trials I faced are minor compared to some,

but still I can not fathom how people can look at me and tell me not to be sad,

because just because my life wasn’t as bad as others,

doesn’t mean it wasn’t bad,

It was just different…

I mean I don’t expect everyone to understand,

but I expect them to respect it,

because it isn’t their story,

or their pain,

or there memories that haunt them,

they are mine!

So don’t tell me I can’t be sad,

or lonely,

or happy,

or scared,

because you haven’t walked a mile in my shoes,

and even if you did it wouldn’t be enough,

because honey,

A MILE IS NOWHERE CLOSE TO A LIFETIME!

So I am sorry I am angry,

and that I spit words with poison and wine,

but it is because I am scared,

again,

just like everyday,

but I am taking life one baby step at a time.

So remember,

everyone can feel how they want,

and has the right to say so,

so don’t judge them,

just love them,

listen,

let their tears flow,

because when someone is crying out,

we don’t want to be told how to feel,

we just want to know we aren’t crazy,

or alone,

and that no matter what,

we are worth it,

and normal,

and perfectly sane,

we are human,

we are loved,

we are beautifully insane.